“I truly believe that it's very important that we bring our attention to what went well, what didn't really and especially what we can do to change the habits or our patterns so that we can change the story, we can change our life.” - Elisa Palma-Hancock

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A Soul Centered Personal Review with Elisa Palma-Hancock

Welcome to Imperfection in Progress, a podcast for ambitious women who are people-pleasers, perfectionists, or procrastinators. Want to feel less stress and more joy in your life? Then this is for you. I’m your host Dawn Calvinisti.

Today’s podcast is a great conversation around why we need to review what we’ve done in order to plan where we want to go. My guest today is Elisa Palma-Hancock. Her biggest passions have always been art and all things metaphysics. 

Her natural intuitive gifts developed early within a like-minded family: her beloved Grandma taught her to read cards when she was a teen. She dedicated her younger years to theatre, music, and exploring different disciplines, from Astrology to Reiki, always looking for the answer to the eternal question: what’s my purpose? 

After an awakening experience, she answered the call to do more of what she'd been doing all along: being a channel for Love, Positivity, and Spirit. She trained in several disciplines while healing herself from the many layers of negative beliefs and conditioning. Elisa now helps people transform their own inner blocks into clarity, confidence and self-love, and to live purposefully both life and business. Native Italian, she relocated to the U.S. years ago and loves to share her time between the two worlds.

 Elisa is offering a fantastic workshop next week that will walk you through all aspects of a heart led year end review. If you are listening to this at the time of release make sure you go to the link in the show notes to register.

Here’s our conversation.

Episode Transcript

[00:00:00] Dawn Calvinisti: I'm so happy to introduce you to Elisa. And Elisa is somebody who I think at this time of year especially, has some great advice and great knowledge in the area of what do we wanna be looking at as we're reviewing this year, as we're setting up ideas and goals and plans for next year. And helping us to do that in a way that feels good and makes us excited and motivates us to want to move forward.

And I think sometimes in December, I don't know about you Elisa, but sometimes in December we can feel like we've missed the things we're setting ourselves up for. And now we're in this crunch time, so I am so glad that you're here to walk us through some of this. Welcome.

[00:00:40] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Thank you. Thank you, Dawn. Yes, absolutely. I would absolutely agree with you. December. It's usually that time where you start looking at what happened really and what didn't really happen. Sometimes, like the balance is not that good that we're looking at and so this is also part of the reason why I came up with this process that I worked through over the years. And it's also like such a perfect time, I believe, because even if it's not that everything is going to change on January 1st. I believe that there is this sense of coming to an ending in a way, right?

Because we know that we change a number and even just on an energetical level, actually the number that changes will bring in different influences, different energies. So, I truly believe that it's very important that we bring our attention to what went well, what didn't really and especially what we can do to change maybe the habits or our patterns so that we can change the story, we can change our life.

[00:01:47] Dawn Calvinisti: Yes, exactly. And I think that's the one thing, and I keep coming back to this, I think I've said this on multiple episodes over this fall, but the idea of we often just continue to do the steps that we have either in our agenda or our schedule. These things that we think are necessary to move our business forward as an entrepreneur.

But we never really stopped to say. But is that what I really want to be doing? Is that where I feel good? Is that where I am putting energy in a way that works for me? Is that an area where I feel overwhelmed is an area where it's burning me out, but we just don't stop to question and we do it because it's there on the schedule without questioning.

[00:02:29] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Absolutely. Yes. Yes. And this is why I shifted over time because this whole process started as a reason for me, right towards the end of the year to I would naturally maybe feel inclined to look at what happened and what did I want to create anew. And then year after year I found myself not very accomplished, not very satisfied.

And over time I realized that I was definitely setting goals with the wrong part of myself. I was keeping on doing the same things as you just said, not really paying attention if they were working, not really paying attention if they were really aligned with my energy, with how I felt about things.

And so, as I created this process over time, I kept on adding pieces and finally came up to the realization that it is so important that we not only create that awareness that we need in our daily schedule but also that we are very in touch with our own energy, right? With how our own energy moves and with the part of ourselves that we are using to set our goals.

Because this is actually what is going to change the story. So, an end of year review is in my opinion, necessary. I am a fan of reviews, even if it's just the end of day. Honestly, I do a lot of those too, or at end of week. Because it's like you are reading something, you cannot really turn the page unless you get to the end, right?

You cannot start anew unless you are done with what happened, and to be done means so much more than just saying, okay, I made you know this amount of money, or I reached these number of goals and these really didn't work out, and that's it. There is so much more good that can come out of that process.

[00:04:33] Dawn Calvinisti: I agree. I think sometimes, especially with my perfectionists, they often feel like if they just checked all the boxes, they got the list done every day, then that was a good week and we often don't take time to think about how did I feel in that process? Do I have anything left to give at the end of the process? Am I excited about going into next week, having this week completed? So yeah, I agree with you. There's a lot of other parts.

[00:04:59] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Yes. Yes. And we just, I think that we tend to approach we are creative, we are excited. Some of us are maybe more goal-oriented than others. That's all fine and perfect, but the problem comes when we kind of try and repeat things that other people do, maybe because we see that it works for them but we're not really checking in.

It's like, using marketing strategies because someone tells us that we should be doing those and not getting results because they're not really aligning with us or who we are or how our energy works. And that makes a whole difference.

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[00:05:37] Dawn Calvinisti: I know that you're going to be doing a workshop and walking through side by side with people who are attending how to do this process. And we're gonna put that in the show notes so that if you would like to jump in there and be a part of that workshop, absolutely get into the show notes and click that link and get yourself registered to do that.

But some of the things that I would love to hear about the year end process are what, what types of things are we going to find that we're needing to look at what are we actually wanting to look at? Are we looking at facts and figures? Are we looking at feelings? What is it that we're looking at?

[00:06:14] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Yes. So exactly during the workshop, of course the work is way more in depth, but just to give a preview and give some pointers that can be useful since the end of the year is fast approaching. What I first suggest when we want to start with this process is actually to make sure that we create a a space for that.

Because this helps really set the intention straight. Of course, we can sit down and as you said, just scribble a few, yes, this went well. I made this much money. Okay, all good. And now I'm gonna move ahead and if that works for you, by all means do that. But we want to start by creating a space because we need to from that sort of mindless checking the boxes to a being present and feeling okay. So it has definitely much more to do with our emotions and what we have learned than with just making a list. Okay. Lists are always useful and they definitely, there is a part that requires that. But we first start by setting the right space.

 Of course guiding the group, usually I do it with a specific meditation that I teach, et cetera but if you're doing it at your own place, you can even just light a candle or, put on some nice music. But you wanna make sure that you are telling yourself, this is me time and I am taking this time to go deep.

I'm taking this time to receive some very, very useful information. And already for me and I find for all the people that I have led through this workshop, when we set that clear intention, when whatever actually we are about to do that is important, right? When we create the right space around us we can feel the difference.

So as soon as we set the stage, I would guide you through what I call digging up the gold. And that is a process that it's not just making a list or answering a few questions about what went well or what didn't, but we really take the time to let. First of all you will be in a very relaxed state.

You will be in a very center state. And so at that point, what comes up is not just a list of your ego trying to tell you, oh, look at all those beautiful things, or look at all those ugly things that happened to you. But like what comes up is really the voice of your deeper wisdom. The part that we all have and that we can all access.

And that is why it's gold, what we are digging up. Because whatever we went through, if it was a very challenging year, and so many of us have gone through a lot or it's been a fairly good year we are able to distill the lessons that we need to bring along with us. So this for me creates really like the right stage to be able to turn that page that I was talking about before.

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[00:09:26] Dawn Calvinisti: I love how you're talking about setting the stage. And really setting that place apart from what is our normal, daily routine. And I have to say, this is one of those things, and I'm sure you would agree that anytime, like even like we were saying about at the end of the week, having that time of reflection or the end of the month having a time of reflection.

When you do that intentionally, when you step a little bit outside of the workday and of general life, and even like you were saying about lighting a candle, but just making it a little bit special, a little bit different so that your whole mind, body, spirit are in the place where it's ready to receive what is in you, right?

When you're talking about your wisdom I think that's so important for us to do that on a regular basis. And I love that you're guiding people through this this month, end of year especially. But this is something we can do on a regular basis too.

[00:10:19] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Absolutely yes. In fact, I say, like, you can do this at the end of the year. You can do this at your birthday, for example, because that is your new year, that is starting right there. And you can do that at the end of the day if you are ready to start anew so you can go through the whole process if maybe it's, I don't know January 30th and you haven't yet.

You are still on time. It's perfect, right? But whatever calls you, whenever you feel that you are ready to turn that page and start anew, and, as you said, end of the month, end of the day, end of the week, it doesn't matter. It will just make a huge difference because it helps you be present.

And when you're present, you realize, you recognize what is true and right for you. I remember at the beginning of this journey of entrepreneurship I would idealize this schedule for myself when I had back to back things basically almost all day for a good amount of the week. And that was because a coach actually asked me to create your ideal schedule and I was then moving just from maybe working for someone else to starting my own adventure.

And I am so happy that what I wrote down never happened. First of all, because I am a, an empath, I'm an introverted person, and if I really had to go through five days of what I put down on that calendar, I would've probably be exhausted in, in the matter of a couple of months. And, like now that I have so many years of working for myself under my belt, I realized that I was not setting those goals with my true self. Those were ideas that I had collected looking at what was working for other people and what other people were doing, and what I thought was the thing to do. So, a lot of us are still probably influenced by also how we see maybe men, right? Doing business. We just work on a different kind of energy and on a different kind of flow.

And so that is absolutely necessary bringing awareness to the present moment and realizing and digging up the gold is so necessary to make sure that we do not make the same mistake over and over.

[00:12:50] Dawn Calvinisti: I've talked to women recently who were in a business for themselves, some type of entrepreneurship, and they're feeling like not, not burnt out, but feeling like the joy has gone from their business. They're not really motivated anymore. It's hard to get to the desk and get the things done and the real excitement and love of that journey has disappeared. And I think what you're talking about here is such a good way to check in and decide like, am I still going in this path? Do I need to make changes? Are there other things I need to start doing or looking at instead in order to regain that excitement and that joy and that love of life and of my business.

And I think often this is where procrastination can get a hold of you and then you don't do the things because you're not really wanting to do them at all anymore.

[00:13:46] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Exactly. Yes, yes. Procrastination is definitely a, well, probably somehow related to our trauma or in my, in my personal experience and what I observed working with my clients, that is a correlation with trauma. But for sure sometimes it's also a signal that we're just really trying to do something that is not it's not aligned with us. It just doesn't fit, it doesn't vibe. And that I totally understand, that sense of feeling disconnected and not wanting to do the things. And I think that that is a very important, crucial signal to look at. And to dig a little deeper, because that doesn't mean that we're not meant for what we're trying to accomplish.

Probably just means that we are really like walking down the wrong path for us for how we are meant to be working, right? And for maybe how our energy, our soul, wants to express itself through us.

[00:14:45] Dawn Calvinisti: I like that you mentioned just the masculine energy of things too, because there definitely has been for generations. If you want to succeed, if you want to achieve, if you wanna hit a goal, we, we run in that type of energy because that's what has been demonstrated around us. And it's definitely interesting, even in social media, things that you see around often this hustle culture, this, doing more is better in order to succeed.

This is the list that you have to tick off and again, the fact that you're bringing this back to listening, right? Reviewing what has happened this past year. I am sure in your workshop this must be part of what we're going to realize is this the way we need to continue working? Do we need to make changes in the structure or the way that we have been doing things in the energy that we're putting out there. But can you tell us a little bit more about what, what should we be looking for when it comes to feeling aligned, feeling connected to what we're doing?

I. 

[00:15:49] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Yes. So as you, as you mentioned, the the male energy, the masculine energy, so that is something that came up during the all the time, every year. Basically, I rework and add pieces right to this process and at one point it became evident that many of us have a little bit of a split or a disconnection between our feminine and our masculine side.

And so we need to learn to bridge it, to find a communication between those parts. So we are not just trying to push, push, push when our energy is not even there. And so, that is very, very important, right, to set the foundations, because if okay, our masculine energy is the one who's gonna take action and do the things, but it needs to be supported and, and in tune with what our female energy needs and wants and visions. Otherwise, we are always going to feel split in a way. And so, once we have, as I was saying before dug up for the gold and gather our lessons in a way, right? What is important that we bring along with us? Because whatever happened it's teaching us what needs to change, what we have to do differently. And so at that point, and to make sure that we are really aligning, we need to, to switching even more. Listening in a way. I wanna give a personal example 'cause I think this is probably going to explain it in the best way possible. This just comes to mind a few months ago, I was going through the end of that stage that you just mentioned before actually, right? With I was feeling not really. I was not really wanting to continue do things as I had done it because I reached a turning point.

And I remember I, I would try and sit down anyway because we're always learning, right? Nobody's perfect and I am not. So I would try anyway to sit down because we have obligations, we have things that we want to see, wanna be happy and feel satisfied, et cetera. But like, I could just not bring myself.

And then I had to take my own medicine and I sat down and I relaxed and I entered into a meditative state. And that's another process that I teach. And I got in tune with my own wisdom. And actually what came through was that I just needed to leave the house. I needed to go do a yoga lesson and that I needed to take the morning off if possible, even the day.

Without resistance because I decided to listen. I just did that. And when I came back, I think the day after, 'cause I did really took my time. I was in a completely different state and I was so much more ready to see that I was again trying to push in the wrong direction. And I needed to redirect and to listen a little bit more and clean out whatever was not right for me.

It was not aligned for me. There is a lot of self-honesty that has to happen in a sense. 

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[00:19:01] Dawn Calvinisti: Yeah. Yeah. I love that. And I think it goes to the point too and I've talked about this before, but sometimes when we remove ourselves from the moment, and especially if we're listening to our inner wisdom. But if we remove ourselves from that moment in that time, and we take that bit of time off and we allow some creative energy to be a part of the day and we allow our mind to reset, we come back and we get so much more done and not necessarily even physically done, but the, the mindset, our headspace, it's easier.

The flow is there and we're not trying to make it happen, and it feels so much better. So I love that, that you've listened to yourself because you're right, we're all learning. None of us have it perfect. And so this is part of the process.

[00:19:48] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Absolutely, yes. It's a process that, as I said, like I've been going through every year, changing, getting, taking away stuff, getting more wisdom around it, more downloads around it. Like it's, you do it, you have to do it. There is no point where it stops. And then the more you actually practice, right, these steps, the easier it gets to just stop and listen and redirect if needed.

And of course you start setting roles from a completely different perspective. And that I think is what begins to make the real difference.

[00:20:24] Dawn Calvinisti: Yes. For perfectionists that are listening, I know you're probably saying no, like I have a plan and I have to stick with the plan, and it's so hard to redirect or to step away from what you thought you were going to do that day. But the reality is for perfectionists, often burnout happens because of this exact reason, because you just keep pushing forward without stopping.

And so I highly recommend no matter whether you're a people pleaser, a perfectionist, a procrastinator to get into the workshop with Elisa because this is really a lovely space and time of year especially to process and to think things through. If you are not seeing the results you're wanting, then you do have to make a change.

[00:21:13] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Absolutely. Yes. Yes and yes, I agree that the perfectionist in us, is the one that keeps on pushing on those pedals. But it's like, riding a stationary bike, you're not really going anywhere. If you like, a good amount of your energy is not present is not there. So yes, it's a learning process and actually you find perfection in the moment in the end as you start to let go, yes, you learn to let go.

[00:21:43] Dawn Calvinisti: Yes. Where is the best place for people to connect with you?

[00:21:47] Elisa Palma-Hancock: So I would say through my website and I do have a Facebook group because this workshop also has an ebook slash workbook that comes with it. So, they are basically related and in the Facebook group. I do other things, right with the the people that are, the members that are in it. So that is another place where you can definitely connect so, we can know each other a little better.

And I, I also like offer monthly guidance. In that space it is a little more private, right. And direct. And that is definitely a good way also to keep the process going in a sense, because then of course, when we are done with our review parts, we are ready to, create and set the stage for us ahead in a completely different way.

And yes, I would say those probably are the best places.

[00:22:40] Dawn Calvinisti: So I'll put all of the contact information in the show notes. Please go there, especially if you would like to be a part of that workshop. Then go there and get in through the link. The other thing I wanna ask you, because I ask every single guest, is when it comes to the three Ps, which are people pleasing, perfectionism, procrastination, what one do you tend to go to the most?

[00:23:03] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Hmm. I've definitely jumped between the three of them for a very long time. I feel like I have let go of perfectionism a lot and people pleasing as well. So I'd say that procrastination is still probably one of the things that I'm learning from the most these days.

[00:23:23] Dawn Calvinisti: I love how you phrased that, that you're learning from it because we do. 

[00:23:27] Elisa Palma-Hancock: I take it as, as feedback, as I catch myself procrastinating. I just look at am I trying to get in my own way? And most of the time the answer is yes. Sometimes the answer is, I'm just running up the wrong hill. So it's, it's time to calm down and climb down and, go another direction.

[00:23:45] Dawn Calvinisti: Is there anything else that you would like to say to our listeners today before we sign off?

[00:23:50] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Yes, I would say whatever you, sign up for the workshop or not, that's not the point, but I, I really invite you to check in with yourself and begin to pay attention to where your energy is when you do anything in your day, and especially for Entrepreneurs, entrepreneurs and moms who don't have a lot of time on their hand because that is going to over time really change how you experience yourself and your life. And I think that that is so important.

[00:24:23] Dawn Calvinisti: Yes. Thank you so much, Elisa, for being with us today. I loved having this conversation.

[00:24:28] Elisa Palma-Hancock: Thanks for having me. It was fun. 

Dawn Calvinisti: Thanks for listening to today's show. If you found value in what you heard, please share it with a friend and rate and review us on whatever platform you listen on. It really helps get us out to other women who could benefit from listening. 

Check out our show notes for details from the show and to connect with me or our guests. Want to continue the conversation? My website is www.pursueprogress.com or DM me @pursueprogresswithdawn on Instagram. 

Until next week, pursue progress no matter how imperfectly.

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CONNECT WITH ELISA:

Website: elisapalmahancock.com/en

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/elisa.palma/

Year End Review Workshop: https://bit.ly/weaving-your-year

OTHER RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS PODCAST:

Umbrella Virtual Solutions: https://www.umbrellavs.com

Book Your Free 30 Minute Strategy Call with the host, Dawn Calvinisti: https://link.theviphub.ca/widget/bookings/dawncalvinisti/highvaluestrategy