Most Recent Episodes

Work Life Balance

Leading an Intentional Life with Martine Williams

March 13, 202433 min read

“I am not feeling good. I'm cranky all the time. Maybe you're feeling less inspired some days. You're checking out of life. You're checking out of the relationship. Those are all signs of burnout that I think we need to learn to recognize as soon as possible so we can make those adjustments and not wait until that glass ball is completely shattered.” - Martine Williams

CLICK HERE FOR FULL EPISODE

Leading an Intentional Life with Martine Williams

Welcome to Imperfection in Progress, a podcast for ambitious women who are people-pleasers, perfectionists, or procrastinators. Want to feel less stress and more joy in your life? Then this is for you. I’m your host Dawn Calvinisti.

It’s my privilege to introduce you to Martine Williams. Martine is a life coach, keynote speaker, public motivator, podcaster, and mompreneur. She knows what it takes to build a business from the ground up…while prioritizing time with her husband and two sons. Martine became a thriving entrepreneur heading a multimillion-dollar organization, leading and coaching nearly 28,000 women and over her more than 15 years as a leader and national speaker, Martine found her passion for helping other women achieve success in business and at home. 

She knows the struggles all Mompreneurs face: How to find harmony without experiencing serious burnout? Through her Illuminate YOU Coaching, she delivers a proven approach for empowering women and leadership teams to get from where they are to where they want to go with more clarity, confidence and courage. Martine discovered a secret: being stuck is a mindset, not a position. And now she is here to show you how to find that same clarity over chaos! Through the research-based ProScan® Survey and her specialized Coaching, she is helping Mompreneurs shift their mindset, so they can illuminate their strengths, cultivate their confidence, and elevate their life.

 Check her out at martinewilliams.com

This is a big episode where we discuss the idea of balance and if it really exists. We also cover being intentional, how to choose what to focus on and how to slow down. There is some juicy content here and I know you’ll get a lot out of it.

Here’s our conversation.

Work Life Balance

Episode Transcript

[00:00:00] Dawn Calvinisti: On today's episode, we're welcoming Martine Williams to the show, and I am super excited to have you here, Martine, and to talk all around the ideas of, I guess, this work life balance, a bit about burnout, but we're really going to dig into a lot of interesting things today.

[00:00:17] Martine Williams: No, I'm so excited. Thank you. These are my passion topics. So I'm really excited to be here and and share with your listeners.

[00:00:23] Dawn Calvinisti: I know that I mentioned a bit about you and your bio, but I'd love to hear, why is it that this is the areas that you focus on?

[00:00:32] Martine Williams: Because I am her, I am a mompreneur for sure. I've been a mompreneur for 17 years and I've experienced burnout. I've experienced the trap of trying to create work life balance. Balance is not my favorite word. We can get into that at some point, but because I have, I've lived this life and I've learned the lessons along the way, I'm passionate and I really think we all, our past struggles become our present purposes, and so if I can help someone else.

Shortcut the mistakes I've made in my mindsets and my you know energy and my burnout and things like that Then that's really what I want to do.

[00:01:06] Dawn Calvinisti: I think it's really interesting when we create, the, the thing that we do from something that we've learned from, I think a lot of us try to fill that gap, right?

Like, that wish we'd had. when when you talk about this, like. I can tell just from your tone of voice, like this is truly important to you, right?

Like this is area that matters. So for our women that are listening, just to kick it off, because a lot of them are the people pleasers, the perfectionists, the procrastinators, and much of that leads to burnout and that type of mindset. Do you see yourself in any of those particular P's?

[00:01:46] Martine Williams: All of them I mean at one point in time I struggled with all of them, and It it really it requires you to slow down and actually identify. Which one is it? Yes, yes, yes to all the above.

I mean, I've experienced all three of those and, and I would say that the one I struggle with the most probably right now is just procrastination. And that's because my personality, I am what they call a thruster. And so I work better under pressure. And people who work better under pressure wait until they have the pressure to do something, right?

And so, I used to really look down on myself because of that, but now that I fully understand because of the work that I do with the personality and performance survey that I use, I fully understand it now and I can embrace it and say, Okay, now I can't let that be an excuse to procrastinate, but I also need to realize that I actually do work better under pressure.

If I have a keynote coming up or a training coming up, like, you give me three months, I'm going to wait until... A week or so ahead of time to repair because I, my best work comes out under pressure. So yeah, but that's, over time as someone who puts a lot of passion, a lot of energy behind those things and that I work better under pressure is really important for people like me with my personality to have those pockets of rest, to have those times where you maybe think about a rocket ship, it launches, right.

And it launches because of all the pressure and the buildup. So that's what thruster does, but they have to come back to the launch pad. Before they relaunch it again, it has to come back and refuel and check all the engines and all the things. And I think for moms mompreneurs especially, like we just continue to thrust all day long and we continue to just output, output, output.

And because we're people pleasing or maybe we're procrastinating or, I can't remember the third fee. I dunno why I can't keep that in my head, but those things all come into play for the burnout.

[00:03:29] Dawn Calvinisti: And when you're talking about like mompreneurs especially.

And you're right, like, we, we do, we go all day, all day, all day, we give out all day, all day, all day. And especially depending on what, what stage of life, life we are in, I think it's important for us just to recognize here. Yes, moms that have young kids, there's a lot that you physically have to do.

Like your child may not be up to doing it all. But that doesn't mean that when you're a mom of a teenager, that you do any less.

So I just want to say that across the board, because maybe you're at the beginning of thinking, like, it's going to get better. Yeah, it gets different.

[00:04:06] Martine Williams: It's just different. It is. I mean, I remember when I started my business 17 years ago, my kids were younger. I had a one year old and now I have an 18 year old and a 15 year old. And so they don't require the same. The same things, but they still require things, right? And a lot of it is in my head, right?

A lot of it is my mindset and my thoughts and all the things I'm thinking about and trying to solve problems, help them solve problems from a different perspective than when they were two, right? And we're trying to protect them from hitting their head on the table or we're making sure that they're being fed all of those things.

So yeah, it's just a different kind of energy that you're still putting out there and you need to make sure that you're refueling.

[00:04:42] Dawn Calvinisti: There's one thing I want to say here before we go on, because I don't think I ever say it actually out loud. And I, I want to normalize this for women. If you feel like you do more work than your partner, 24 7. You are right.

Like, I don't want to minimize that because I think for a lot of women they can be told either by their partner or by somebody else or whatever that, we're equal partners.

And yes, in a sense, but the reality is, yes, moms do keep the daily tasks in their head, the appointments that are coming up. They're the ones that are making sure everything is ready for that has to happen. So I just, I just want to acknowledge that because think. Some of that is yes, we do take it on and we also have to take it on.

[00:05:26] Martine Williams: Oh, yeah, and there's a funny meme that's out there. I'm gonna totally butcher it, but you'll get the point. Like, for someone to step into your role as a mom, they would need a full three ring binder to be able to come on to that job description because there are so many things that you are keeping on.

Like, they would need a full three ring binder filled with information. So that's in your head. Right, and those are things that you're thinking about, even if you're not physically doing them, you're thinking about them, and you're right, like, it's just, it's a lot, because of how we're designed to be the nurturers and to be those people that do that, we're not able, we have 50 tabs open on our computer, a man typically opens one and closes one, for us, we have 50 tabs open at the same time, and that's how our life is too, so it's really, again, important to realize that about ourselves, but then, okay, what can we take off, what are the tabs that do need to go ahead and be closed?

For now because you're in this season with your kids or you're in this season with your business. When we try to do it all That's where we get into trouble.

[00:06:22] Dawn Calvinisti: So let's talk more about that, because I think sometimes when we are on that go, go, go, like you're saying, and we feel like we have to be, we don't get like where that's headed to until it's either too late or it's awfully close to being too late.

[00:06:38] Martine Williams: Mm hmm. Yeah. Yeah I think you have to realize you may have heard this analogy before like, you know If you're juggling all the things which we are as moms there's some things that are rubber balls and if you drop them, they'll bounce back up some are glass balls You drop those then they could be scuffed, they could be scratched, they could be completely shattered.

And so you have to decide what are the rubber balls in my life and what are the glass balls in my life. Your family is probably a glass ball. You don't want to drop that one. Most of the time we, we It's, it's the work, right? That we keep, we keep trying to keep up in the air, but it's actually a rubber ball.

You could drop that. It's going to come back. But if you're dropping your health, which is a glass ball, you're dropping your integrity or you're dropping your relationships. Those are the things that I have seen as someone who's coached thousands of women. I've seen them sacrifice on the altar of success.

They're on this one track direction trying to climb either the corporate ladder or as an entrepreneur, just trying to get to that next goal. And like you said, until it actually hits you square between the eyes that, hey, I'm hustling 24/7, 365. I have no margin. I am not feeling good. I'm cranky all the time.

Maybe you're feeling, like, less inspired some days. You're checking out of life. You're checking out of the relationship. Those are all signs of burnout that I think we need to learn to recognize as soon as possible so we can make those adjustments and not wait until that glass ball is completely shattered.

Which I've seen happen and that's why I'm so passionate about it because there is a better way to do it and there is a different way to do it. You don't have to hustle 24/7, 365, to be a great mom, a great wife and a great business owner.

ADVERTISEMENT

Trying to find out more about me, my guests, or the resources from this podcast? Check out my website at pursueprogress.com for podcast episodes, show notes, coaching options, essential oils to support you, and some fantastic free resources including a 30-minute clarity call. And don’t forget on whatever platform you choose to listen to your podcasts please subscribe to Imperfection in Progress and share us with your friends. We’re so grateful for your support.

[00:08:14] Dawn Calvinisti: So if I'm one of the women that are listening to you right now, and I've heard you say all of those things to recognize, and suddenly I'm thinking, What? Like, this could mean I'm on my way to burnout. What do I do now?

[00:08:28] Martine Williams: Yeah because our natural tendency is to speed up, we feel like we have this ball. We're chasing after it. You can label the ball, whatever you want.

 You're chasing after and the ball just goes faster. We think we're going to catch it one day and that's the mindset we have. Oh, one day I'll get back to taking care of myself.

When the kids are older, I'll get back to dating my spouse. One day I'll get back and it's always this one day and that one day is not coming. It just doesn't show up. You have to decide that today is going to be your day one. And day one starts with getting still, getting a pen and paper out, writing out, what, what is important for me in this season, number one, and what's not, like, what can I just let go of because it's just not serving me anymore. Sometimes we just keep doing things out of habit. We keep doing things out of obligation. We keep doing things out of worried about saying no and feeling guilt and all of those things. But some things and some people can't go with you where you're going next.

And the only way you're going to be able to recognize that is to slow down. So then you can speed up. So you've got to slow down, figure out what your priorities are first. And then secondly, a lot of times burnout comes from not doing too much or working too hard. It comes from doing too little of the things that actually bring you joy.

And this is, I know someone's listening and they, they are going to be just like I was when I found myself sitting on the couch with tears in my eyes, because I couldn't think of anything that I wanted to do for fun that didn't have this productive in, because I'm always producing, I'm always something's got to be spent time.

It's going to help me get towards my goal. Everything had to have a productive in. And so I know someone's listening and they're like, I don't know. And you're not, I want to say you're not alone. There are so many women, almost every day I talk to, and I say, What do you like to do just for fun? They can't think of a single thing.

And you have to just start trying different things. And it can be small things. Like for me, one of the first things was getting back to listening to the kind of music I like when I'm getting ready. I used to do that when I was a little girl. But I had gotten to this place where I was listening to a podcast, or I was listening to a book.

Everything was about personal and professional development, which is really good. But sometimes you just need to, like, have a dance party, in your house or in your bathroom when you're getting ready, or in your car. Sometimes you just need to stop for five minutes and take some deep breaths. It doesn't have to cost a lot of money.

It doesn't have to take a lot of time. You can't have the all or nothing mentality here. It's really, slowing down, figure out what's important to you, but then also figuring out what are some things you like to do just for fun.

[00:10:51] Dawn Calvinisti: Yeah I, I can totally relate here. I know I've spoken to many women who, when asked, like, what do you enjoy? Or what, what, what do you wish you could be doing? There's a blank, like, I don't know. And we, we tend to lose ourselves, especially in motherhood.

We can lose ourselves and the person that we were. And we may not be that person anymore. But we're not only a mother, or we're not only a businesswoman, and I think we forget that there's other parts to our, our existence that actually keep us healthy mentally, emotionally, physically, by having that joy in our life.

[00:11:27] Martine Williams: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, what you do is not who you are. I have to remind my clients all the time. What you do as a mom is not who you are. What you do as a business owner is not who you are. There is more to you than these roles and these hats that you wear. And we just gotta sit down long enough. And we're just in this fast paced society right now where the slowdown is really hard, especially if you are a high achieving woman, mompreneur for no like you're just What's the next thing and the next thing and the next thing and then again you wake up one day and you don't realize some of the damage that's been done to you physically, I mean mentally spiritually emotionally and self care is intentionally spending time in those areas It's with deliberate, like it's intentional. It's not going to happen by accident. So you're going to have to do this for your, no one's coming for you to help you do, you have to make that decision and just start taking one step.

We all have a next step, but we also all have 100 percent responsibility for that next step. And it doesn't have to be a big leap. It can be just turn on some music. Just take a deep breath, phone a friend and go to lunch. Let's not make it complicated. Just get started.

[00:12:33] Dawn Calvinisti: You talked a little bit at the beginning about balance and that you don't like that word, and I don't either. I've said that times. I don't believe there's such a thing, at least not like, like scale balance. I believe there's teeter totter balance. Like, one ends ends down at different times. How do you define balance? What? Does that mean do you use that word at all?

[00:12:52] Martine Williams: I don't, it's interesting. Like I say it sometimes because I know people are looking for that, right? Like it, when I'm sending out email, like that's what they want. Cause that's what everybody says. You've got to have work life balance. But when you think about scale, right, 50 percent and 50 percent to make it balanced, it has to be 50, 50.

And that's just not reality. And I think we all try to reach that and we're just. burning ourselves at both ends of the candle to reach this balance, when really you can think of it as harmony. If you think about an orchestra in a symphony, you have a really large tuba. It's a huge instrument, right, playing really loud. And then you have other instruments that are smaller, like a flute that plays really, really soft. But they play in harmony together, right? And so sometimes in your life and in your business, you're gonna need to play the tuba. It's really loud. So maybe your business is gonna have to play really loud this time of year.

Maybe this is the time, like when I was in direct sales, this was the busy time of the year was the fall. And I knew I was gonna have to play the tuba. And as long as I, communicate to my family, Hey, I'm gonna be playing the tuba over the next three months, then they knew that was what was gonna happen.

It wasn't like I was going away forever. And then there's seasons, like last year, my se, my son was a senior. And so I was playing the flute in my business and I was playing family time, like a tuba. And so you can have this harmonious, most beautiful sound that's coming from the different parts of your life.

When you look at it from a place of harmony and communicating what that's going to look like in the different seasons, because even as you're listening to that song that's playing, by the orchestra, there's, there's loud moments and there's soft moments. And then there's some in between moments, but you just have to realize it's.

The 5050 trying to reach that is just, it's impossible.

[00:14:29] Dawn Calvinisti: It's interesting. I find since the pandemic, the difference in what people are wanting, like suddenly we're reevaluating everything.

[00:14:38] Martine Williams: and 

[00:14:39] Dawn Calvinisti: What is actually important at this in our life. And what do we want to go forward with? And what do we want to let go of? Are you finding that as people are adjusting coming through this time, that they're also making a more. I guess a more important statement about what really is life for them right now.

[00:14:57] Martine Williams: I think they realized the slowdown. Like, I think we were all forced to slow down and I think they realized the pace that they were going. I know for me, that was my personal experience because, we were, we, we can learn from those crisis moments. And I think they were forced to slow down. And when you're forced to slow down, you have to kind of look around and what's going on.

Right? And a lot of times we I want to do that. We don't want to stop and look in the mirror. And like you said, ask those important questions. Am I spending time with the people and the places and the things that are helping me get to where I want to go? And I do think that time allowed for a lot of reflection and people are making different decisions and making more decisions, I think, from that place of who do I want to be? What am I here for? Who, what is really important to me in this season? The problem is, as we're kind of coming back out of it now, and the culture is starting to pick back up, and the pace is picking back up, they still have this desire to make the decisions from that place, but they're just seeing everybody going back to, that hustle, and they're like, Nope, I guess that's what I'm supposed to do.

Instead of trusting their intuition, trusting what they know and what they learned about themselves and having that confidence to make that decision based on that and not what they're seeing or what they're being told to do.

ADVERTISEMENT

Hey, wonderful listeners! If you're an entrepreneur or a business owner like me, then you know the struggle of juggling a million tasks while trying to focus on what really matters. Well, guess what? I've got a game-changer for you, and it's called Umbrella Virtual Solutions!

You know those tasks that make you want to pull your hair out? The ones you'd rather avoid like the plague? Yep, Umbrella Virtual Solutions has got you covered. Need a killer website that'll make your competitors jealous? Boom, they’re the web wizards you need.

And let's talk about virtual events. Everyone loves attending them, but the behind-the-scenes madness? Not so much. Luckily, these experts are your event architects. They'll plan, set up, and run the whole shebang, so you can shine in the spotlight without the tech headache.

Now, here's the best part: If you're a fellow podcaster, like yours truly, you know that editing can be a real audio nightmare. But fear not, because Umbrella Virtual Solutions are audio editing maestros. They'll transform your raw recordings into podcasting gold while you sip your coffee and relax.

And hey, who wants to drown in emails and social media management? Not me! That's where Umbrella Virtual Solutions really shine. They love diving into the admin abyss, leaving you with a clean slate to focus on your passion projects.

But hold on, there's more. These folks aren't just about ticking off tasks. They're your partners in business creation. Got a brilliant business but no clue where to start? They will guide you through the process, turning your dreams into a reality.

Do you know what they’ve done for me? They’ve given me back my time and peace of mind? Head over to umbrellavs.com and book a free strategy call. Say goodbye to overwhelm and hello to a whole lot of extra hours in your day.

That's umbrellavs.com – where dreams become reality and tasks become history. Check 'em out and get ready to conquer the world, one stress-free day at a time!

[00:16:07] Dawn Calvinisti: Yeah. One thing that I think is interesting too is the whole idea of one day you've talked about, like, one day I'm going to have it one day. It's going to look like this one day. It's going to, that's not coming. And I agree with you, that's not coming. And your one day is now and you need to create it now, but there, there is kind of two parts that I see with women that I, that I coach. One is that they, they get it right. They get it that I need to change and not be do, do, do, do. And I do need to start creating a life that's, that's not just manageable, but enjoyable and it's going to be good for the long run. But the other thing I sometimes see is women who have that feeling of, okay, but I am going to have, like, my kids are going to be older in five years and Then I'll be able to do that thing. And it's almost like there's a procrastination around the idea Going for anything until the time is better. The time is right. And I think that's also a detriment. So what do you do with with that kind of difference? One is I'll do it all now, but then the other is. Like, I need to wait for the timing.

[00:17:13] Martine Williams: Well, the fact is we're not guaranteed another breath. None of us are. None of us are guaranteed tomorrow. And so I always bring it back to that, first and foremost is you may not have another five years. I know that sounds doom and gloom, but it's just the fact. We saw that. That was very evident during the pandemic.

Life can change so quickly. And so why would we wait to create what you want in five years when you can start creating it now? It may not be exactly where you want it. Right now, but you can start taking steps. It's like people who, have this burning desire to be an entrepreneur, but they're still looking at corporate.

Well, I'm not going to tell you to quit your corporate job right now, but there are steps you can be taking to work towards exiting that if it's sucking the life out of you, it's not allowing you to have your boundaries and have time with your family. So it's not like all or nothing. And that's the mentality that we kind of have.

And I know a lot of my clients find that they realize I'm all or nothing here. It's either go, go, go or, or not. And so I think first and foremost, you're not guaranteed another day. And then why not start working on it now? And the reason why I believe most don't is because they're waiting to be ready.

And here's what everyone needs to hear on this call. Ready is a decision. It's not a feeling. It's a decision to make not a feeling to feel I did not feel ready when I started my podcast I did not feel ready when I birthed my first son I did not feel ready when I took my first step onto a big stage I didn't feel ready, but I decided to be ready and I decided to get ready and when we're waiting it's not because we don't want it a lot of times.

It's because we're afraid of failure. We're afraid of what people are going to think. We don't have all the confidence. We don't, especially if you're someone who likes all the details. That's me. I want the full blueprint of what I'm supposed to do. You don't have all those answers yet. So no wonder you're worried about it.

And no wonder you're giving yourself an out. And that's what they're doing. Does Yeah, sense?

[00:19:02] Dawn Calvinisti: Totally. All of my, my perfectionists out there, I know you're all like cringing right now. But, but we know it's true. We know

[00:19:10] Martine Williams: it's true. 

[00:19:11] Dawn Calvinisti: But the reality is, I mean, no matter what, you're never going to have all the details. And I that's an important thing to know. And, and really by taking the step, right, to know more.

You're going to know more. Reassess after and, and and tweak and so on.

[00:19:29] Martine Williams: Yeah, if you throw a dart at a dart board, and you're sitting there the whole time trying to aim the dart and get it in the bullseye, and you're waiting to get it perfect before you throw the dart, you're never going to learn where you're off until you throw the dart. You throw the dart, and then you see, am I to the right of the bullseye or to the left of the bullseye?

But until you throw that first dart, you don't know where you need to make adjustments. So you just have to take that first step. Do it, Bessie. Imperfect. I know before you have the perfect plan, be willing to take imperfect action because action brings clarity. Clarity brings confidence and confidence creates more action.

It's not the opposite. You have to take the action first and the confidence will come and then clarity will come and your confidence will increase.

[00:20:09] Dawn Calvinisti: Yeah. And I think that's a really key point here. The reality is confidence doesn't come until you start to see results. And how do you see results without taking action?

[00:20:21] Martine Williams: Right, right. It seems so simple, right? And listen, it's not easy. I'm not, I'm not saying anything that I'm saying are easy to do. It's just you just have to start. And I think we overcomplicate, we overthink. I'm the queen of that and I'm learning that it's not helping. It's not serving me to get to my goal is if I'm waiting.

around to be ready, 

[00:20:40] Dawn Calvinisti: I know we talked a little bit about this at the beginning, but now today in your everyday, what is the P that you most often fall back to? Is it people pleasing, perfectionism, or procrastination?

[00:20:54] Martine Williams: Probably perfectionism. And it's interesting because I never considered myself really a perfectionist until probably over the last, I don't know, probably six months, eight months, I started realizing like, okay, why am I not taking action? And it's a really great question to ask yourself. Why am I not taking action?

It's either the thoughts that I'm thinking, the feelings that I'm feeling and the thoughts have been, I don't have it all together. I don't have all the pieces of the funnel, right? I don't have all the pieces of the website done. I don't have all the pieces, well you know what? Someone said to me, they said, You're not, you're not making any income and you're not helping anyone.

Sitting where you are right now and trying to mull it all over in your head and get all the pieces together, you're not making any money and you're not helping anyone. And I was like, wow, you're right. And for me, it wasn't about the money. It was like, there are people out there who need to hear. And need to need to have coaching, and there are people there are women out there Who need to hear what I have to say, but because i'm in my own head About not having it perfect and not having all the things done.

No one's being helped And so that really actually had a friend years ago when I first launched my first course And she said the exact same thing to me And she said I said it's not ready. I said i'm supposed to go live on facebook and it's I just don't You know, I was freaking out about it She was like well, you're just being selfish Just like that.

And I was like, and I'm, I'm really like one of the most least selfish person that I know. I'm like, what are you talking about? I'm not selfish because you have something that someone else needs and you're trying to get all the details right. And so now no one's hearing it. You're being selfish. And that lit a fire under me.

Just like the comment this last six months, it lit a fire under me and I just went live and I'm like, you know what? I'm just going to do this. Same thing with coaching. Open up my coaching business. The website wasn't ready. I don't need a website to coach someone. I just need to talk to someone and tell them what I do and make offers to help them. That's it. That's really all I needed to do. And so that's what I did.

[00:22:48] Dawn Calvinisti: Where is the best place for us to connect with you if we want to hear more?

[00:22:52] Martine Williams: So I have a podcast, the Mom4Life Remixed podcast. My website is martinelilliams. com and then I mostly hang out on Instagram. It's kind of behind the scenes, real, real life stuff. So you can find me at martinelilliams and I'm also on LinkedIn. Those are the best places.

[00:23:07] Dawn Calvinisti: Perfect. And I know that you have a free gift for us. It's the burnout quiz and breakthrough tips. Can you tell us a little bit about what we can do with those?

[00:23:15] Martine Williams: Yes, so the quiz is awareness, right? That's the first step is having awareness. Like, are you on the verge of this burnout? And some of the questions may be like, I never would have thought of that as a burnout question. Excuse me. So it just kind of helps you to figure out where are you? Like, how close are you?

Are you in the middle of a burnout? Some of you may be able to answer that without even doing the quiz. And if that's so, if that's true, then you're not alone, number one. And that's why I have the breakthrough burnout tips. And so these are just some helpful things that have helped me, that has helped my clients take just some very simple steps to help you work your way out of it.

[00:23:45] Dawn Calvinisti: This is awesome. So if you are looking for all of this and all the contact info from our team, you can go to the show notes. We have everything there for you and make sure that you grab the quiz and the tips. And if there's anything else that you would like to wrap up with today, what do you have to say to our listeners?

[00:24:03] Martine Williams: I would say that your business, your parenting, your marriage or other relationships are only as healthy as you are. You are your greatest asset. You're not a liability. And so you really have to make sure that you're protecting your greatest asset. And that looks different for all of us, but all the other things that you're trying to keep good and trying to keep healthy and trying to keep successful are only going to be that because you're doing that for yourself.

[00:24:26] Dawn Calvinisti: Thank you so much for being on the podcast today, Martine, it is awesome to be able to have women come on who really have been there, who know what it's like, and who have a passion for really helping other women in that place to get out of it and not go through what we've been through. So thank you so much for being here.

[00:24:43] Martine Williams: Yes. Thank you so much for having me. .

[DAWN CALVINISTI]

Thanks for listening to today's show. If you found value in what you heard, please share it with a friend and rate and review us on whatever platform you listen on. It really helps get us out to other women who could benefit from listening. 

Check out our show notes for details from the show and to connect with me or our guests. Want to continue the conversation? My website is www.pursueprogress.com or DM me @pursueprogresswithdawn on Instagram. 

Until next week, pursue progress no matter how imperfectly.


Links from this episode:

CONNECT WITH DAWN:

Website: https://pursueprogress.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pursueprogresswithdawn

Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/pursueprogresswithdawn

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/imperfectioninprogress

Imperfection in Progress Podcast: https://pursueprogress.com/podcast

Grab your 200 Affirmations for the 3 P’s here: https://www.pursueprogress.com/affirmationspodcast

CONNECT WITH MARTINE:

Website: https://www.martinewilliams.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/martine31williams/

LinkedIn:  https://www.linkedin.com/in/martine31williams/

Exclusive Offers:  https://www.martinewilliams.com/exclusive-offers

Free Gift: Burnout Quiz and Breakthrough Tips

Link to Free Gift: https://www.martinewilliams.com/pl/2147709785

OTHER RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS PODCAST:

Umbrella Virtual Solutions: https://www.umbrellavs.com

Book Your Free 30 Minute Strategy Call with the host, Dawn Calvinisti: https://link.theviphub.ca/widget/bookings/dawncalvinisti/strategy

work life balanceperfectionismbeing intentional
Coming from a background of natural health Dawn has owned multiple businesses as a doula, a childbirth educator, a homeopath and eventually an essential oil based network marketing business.

Dawn spent 7 years building this business to multiple six-figures and reached the top 3% of leaders in just under 3 years.

As a recovering people-pleaser, perfectionist and procrastinator herself, Dawn created online  summits for women who want to move away from these 3 P’s and find more joy and less stress in life.

She has spoken internationally on multiple podcasts and online summits to inspire women to put themselves on their to-do list without apology. To bring her message to even more women, she launched her podcast “Imperfection in Progress” in January 2023 with a membership site to create community and provide accountability.

Dawn Calvinisti

Coming from a background of natural health Dawn has owned multiple businesses as a doula, a childbirth educator, a homeopath and eventually an essential oil based network marketing business. Dawn spent 7 years building this business to multiple six-figures and reached the top 3% of leaders in just under 3 years. As a recovering people-pleaser, perfectionist and procrastinator herself, Dawn created online summits for women who want to move away from these 3 P’s and find more joy and less stress in life. She has spoken internationally on multiple podcasts and online summits to inspire women to put themselves on their to-do list without apology. To bring her message to even more women, she launched her podcast “Imperfection in Progress” in January 2023 with a membership site to create community and provide accountability.

Back to Blog

What Imperfection in Progress Podcast listeners are saying

More Tools to Help You Be the Best You

Work Life Balance

Leading an Intentional Life with Martine Williams

March 13, 202433 min read

“I am not feeling good. I'm cranky all the time. Maybe you're feeling less inspired some days. You're checking out of life. You're checking out of the relationship. Those are all signs of burnout that I think we need to learn to recognize as soon as possible so we can make those adjustments and not wait until that glass ball is completely shattered.” - Martine Williams

CLICK HERE FOR FULL EPISODE

Leading an Intentional Life with Martine Williams

Welcome to Imperfection in Progress, a podcast for ambitious women who are people-pleasers, perfectionists, or procrastinators. Want to feel less stress and more joy in your life? Then this is for you. I’m your host Dawn Calvinisti.

It’s my privilege to introduce you to Martine Williams. Martine is a life coach, keynote speaker, public motivator, podcaster, and mompreneur. She knows what it takes to build a business from the ground up…while prioritizing time with her husband and two sons. Martine became a thriving entrepreneur heading a multimillion-dollar organization, leading and coaching nearly 28,000 women and over her more than 15 years as a leader and national speaker, Martine found her passion for helping other women achieve success in business and at home. 

She knows the struggles all Mompreneurs face: How to find harmony without experiencing serious burnout? Through her Illuminate YOU Coaching, she delivers a proven approach for empowering women and leadership teams to get from where they are to where they want to go with more clarity, confidence and courage. Martine discovered a secret: being stuck is a mindset, not a position. And now she is here to show you how to find that same clarity over chaos! Through the research-based ProScan® Survey and her specialized Coaching, she is helping Mompreneurs shift their mindset, so they can illuminate their strengths, cultivate their confidence, and elevate their life.

 Check her out at martinewilliams.com

This is a big episode where we discuss the idea of balance and if it really exists. We also cover being intentional, how to choose what to focus on and how to slow down. There is some juicy content here and I know you’ll get a lot out of it.

Here’s our conversation.

Work Life Balance

Episode Transcript

[00:00:00] Dawn Calvinisti: On today's episode, we're welcoming Martine Williams to the show, and I am super excited to have you here, Martine, and to talk all around the ideas of, I guess, this work life balance, a bit about burnout, but we're really going to dig into a lot of interesting things today.

[00:00:17] Martine Williams: No, I'm so excited. Thank you. These are my passion topics. So I'm really excited to be here and and share with your listeners.

[00:00:23] Dawn Calvinisti: I know that I mentioned a bit about you and your bio, but I'd love to hear, why is it that this is the areas that you focus on?

[00:00:32] Martine Williams: Because I am her, I am a mompreneur for sure. I've been a mompreneur for 17 years and I've experienced burnout. I've experienced the trap of trying to create work life balance. Balance is not my favorite word. We can get into that at some point, but because I have, I've lived this life and I've learned the lessons along the way, I'm passionate and I really think we all, our past struggles become our present purposes, and so if I can help someone else.

Shortcut the mistakes I've made in my mindsets and my you know energy and my burnout and things like that Then that's really what I want to do.

[00:01:06] Dawn Calvinisti: I think it's really interesting when we create, the, the thing that we do from something that we've learned from, I think a lot of us try to fill that gap, right?

Like, that wish we'd had. when when you talk about this, like. I can tell just from your tone of voice, like this is truly important to you, right?

Like this is area that matters. So for our women that are listening, just to kick it off, because a lot of them are the people pleasers, the perfectionists, the procrastinators, and much of that leads to burnout and that type of mindset. Do you see yourself in any of those particular P's?

[00:01:46] Martine Williams: All of them I mean at one point in time I struggled with all of them, and It it really it requires you to slow down and actually identify. Which one is it? Yes, yes, yes to all the above.

I mean, I've experienced all three of those and, and I would say that the one I struggle with the most probably right now is just procrastination. And that's because my personality, I am what they call a thruster. And so I work better under pressure. And people who work better under pressure wait until they have the pressure to do something, right?

And so, I used to really look down on myself because of that, but now that I fully understand because of the work that I do with the personality and performance survey that I use, I fully understand it now and I can embrace it and say, Okay, now I can't let that be an excuse to procrastinate, but I also need to realize that I actually do work better under pressure.

If I have a keynote coming up or a training coming up, like, you give me three months, I'm going to wait until... A week or so ahead of time to repair because I, my best work comes out under pressure. So yeah, but that's, over time as someone who puts a lot of passion, a lot of energy behind those things and that I work better under pressure is really important for people like me with my personality to have those pockets of rest, to have those times where you maybe think about a rocket ship, it launches, right.

And it launches because of all the pressure and the buildup. So that's what thruster does, but they have to come back to the launch pad. Before they relaunch it again, it has to come back and refuel and check all the engines and all the things. And I think for moms mompreneurs especially, like we just continue to thrust all day long and we continue to just output, output, output.

And because we're people pleasing or maybe we're procrastinating or, I can't remember the third fee. I dunno why I can't keep that in my head, but those things all come into play for the burnout.

[00:03:29] Dawn Calvinisti: And when you're talking about like mompreneurs especially.

And you're right, like, we, we do, we go all day, all day, all day, we give out all day, all day, all day. And especially depending on what, what stage of life, life we are in, I think it's important for us just to recognize here. Yes, moms that have young kids, there's a lot that you physically have to do.

Like your child may not be up to doing it all. But that doesn't mean that when you're a mom of a teenager, that you do any less.

So I just want to say that across the board, because maybe you're at the beginning of thinking, like, it's going to get better. Yeah, it gets different.

[00:04:06] Martine Williams: It's just different. It is. I mean, I remember when I started my business 17 years ago, my kids were younger. I had a one year old and now I have an 18 year old and a 15 year old. And so they don't require the same. The same things, but they still require things, right? And a lot of it is in my head, right?

A lot of it is my mindset and my thoughts and all the things I'm thinking about and trying to solve problems, help them solve problems from a different perspective than when they were two, right? And we're trying to protect them from hitting their head on the table or we're making sure that they're being fed all of those things.

So yeah, it's just a different kind of energy that you're still putting out there and you need to make sure that you're refueling.

[00:04:42] Dawn Calvinisti: There's one thing I want to say here before we go on, because I don't think I ever say it actually out loud. And I, I want to normalize this for women. If you feel like you do more work than your partner, 24 7. You are right.

Like, I don't want to minimize that because I think for a lot of women they can be told either by their partner or by somebody else or whatever that, we're equal partners.

And yes, in a sense, but the reality is, yes, moms do keep the daily tasks in their head, the appointments that are coming up. They're the ones that are making sure everything is ready for that has to happen. So I just, I just want to acknowledge that because think. Some of that is yes, we do take it on and we also have to take it on.

[00:05:26] Martine Williams: Oh, yeah, and there's a funny meme that's out there. I'm gonna totally butcher it, but you'll get the point. Like, for someone to step into your role as a mom, they would need a full three ring binder to be able to come on to that job description because there are so many things that you are keeping on.

Like, they would need a full three ring binder filled with information. So that's in your head. Right, and those are things that you're thinking about, even if you're not physically doing them, you're thinking about them, and you're right, like, it's just, it's a lot, because of how we're designed to be the nurturers and to be those people that do that, we're not able, we have 50 tabs open on our computer, a man typically opens one and closes one, for us, we have 50 tabs open at the same time, and that's how our life is too, so it's really, again, important to realize that about ourselves, but then, okay, what can we take off, what are the tabs that do need to go ahead and be closed?

For now because you're in this season with your kids or you're in this season with your business. When we try to do it all That's where we get into trouble.

[00:06:22] Dawn Calvinisti: So let's talk more about that, because I think sometimes when we are on that go, go, go, like you're saying, and we feel like we have to be, we don't get like where that's headed to until it's either too late or it's awfully close to being too late.

[00:06:38] Martine Williams: Mm hmm. Yeah. Yeah I think you have to realize you may have heard this analogy before like, you know If you're juggling all the things which we are as moms there's some things that are rubber balls and if you drop them, they'll bounce back up some are glass balls You drop those then they could be scuffed, they could be scratched, they could be completely shattered.

And so you have to decide what are the rubber balls in my life and what are the glass balls in my life. Your family is probably a glass ball. You don't want to drop that one. Most of the time we, we It's, it's the work, right? That we keep, we keep trying to keep up in the air, but it's actually a rubber ball.

You could drop that. It's going to come back. But if you're dropping your health, which is a glass ball, you're dropping your integrity or you're dropping your relationships. Those are the things that I have seen as someone who's coached thousands of women. I've seen them sacrifice on the altar of success.

They're on this one track direction trying to climb either the corporate ladder or as an entrepreneur, just trying to get to that next goal. And like you said, until it actually hits you square between the eyes that, hey, I'm hustling 24/7, 365. I have no margin. I am not feeling good. I'm cranky all the time.

Maybe you're feeling, like, less inspired some days. You're checking out of life. You're checking out of the relationship. Those are all signs of burnout that I think we need to learn to recognize as soon as possible so we can make those adjustments and not wait until that glass ball is completely shattered.

Which I've seen happen and that's why I'm so passionate about it because there is a better way to do it and there is a different way to do it. You don't have to hustle 24/7, 365, to be a great mom, a great wife and a great business owner.

ADVERTISEMENT

Trying to find out more about me, my guests, or the resources from this podcast? Check out my website at pursueprogress.com for podcast episodes, show notes, coaching options, essential oils to support you, and some fantastic free resources including a 30-minute clarity call. And don’t forget on whatever platform you choose to listen to your podcasts please subscribe to Imperfection in Progress and share us with your friends. We’re so grateful for your support.

[00:08:14] Dawn Calvinisti: So if I'm one of the women that are listening to you right now, and I've heard you say all of those things to recognize, and suddenly I'm thinking, What? Like, this could mean I'm on my way to burnout. What do I do now?

[00:08:28] Martine Williams: Yeah because our natural tendency is to speed up, we feel like we have this ball. We're chasing after it. You can label the ball, whatever you want.

 You're chasing after and the ball just goes faster. We think we're going to catch it one day and that's the mindset we have. Oh, one day I'll get back to taking care of myself.

When the kids are older, I'll get back to dating my spouse. One day I'll get back and it's always this one day and that one day is not coming. It just doesn't show up. You have to decide that today is going to be your day one. And day one starts with getting still, getting a pen and paper out, writing out, what, what is important for me in this season, number one, and what's not, like, what can I just let go of because it's just not serving me anymore. Sometimes we just keep doing things out of habit. We keep doing things out of obligation. We keep doing things out of worried about saying no and feeling guilt and all of those things. But some things and some people can't go with you where you're going next.

And the only way you're going to be able to recognize that is to slow down. So then you can speed up. So you've got to slow down, figure out what your priorities are first. And then secondly, a lot of times burnout comes from not doing too much or working too hard. It comes from doing too little of the things that actually bring you joy.

And this is, I know someone's listening and they, they are going to be just like I was when I found myself sitting on the couch with tears in my eyes, because I couldn't think of anything that I wanted to do for fun that didn't have this productive in, because I'm always producing, I'm always something's got to be spent time.

It's going to help me get towards my goal. Everything had to have a productive in. And so I know someone's listening and they're like, I don't know. And you're not, I want to say you're not alone. There are so many women, almost every day I talk to, and I say, What do you like to do just for fun? They can't think of a single thing.

And you have to just start trying different things. And it can be small things. Like for me, one of the first things was getting back to listening to the kind of music I like when I'm getting ready. I used to do that when I was a little girl. But I had gotten to this place where I was listening to a podcast, or I was listening to a book.

Everything was about personal and professional development, which is really good. But sometimes you just need to, like, have a dance party, in your house or in your bathroom when you're getting ready, or in your car. Sometimes you just need to stop for five minutes and take some deep breaths. It doesn't have to cost a lot of money.

It doesn't have to take a lot of time. You can't have the all or nothing mentality here. It's really, slowing down, figure out what's important to you, but then also figuring out what are some things you like to do just for fun.

[00:10:51] Dawn Calvinisti: Yeah I, I can totally relate here. I know I've spoken to many women who, when asked, like, what do you enjoy? Or what, what, what do you wish you could be doing? There's a blank, like, I don't know. And we, we tend to lose ourselves, especially in motherhood.

We can lose ourselves and the person that we were. And we may not be that person anymore. But we're not only a mother, or we're not only a businesswoman, and I think we forget that there's other parts to our, our existence that actually keep us healthy mentally, emotionally, physically, by having that joy in our life.

[00:11:27] Martine Williams: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, what you do is not who you are. I have to remind my clients all the time. What you do as a mom is not who you are. What you do as a business owner is not who you are. There is more to you than these roles and these hats that you wear. And we just gotta sit down long enough. And we're just in this fast paced society right now where the slowdown is really hard, especially if you are a high achieving woman, mompreneur for no like you're just What's the next thing and the next thing and the next thing and then again you wake up one day and you don't realize some of the damage that's been done to you physically, I mean mentally spiritually emotionally and self care is intentionally spending time in those areas It's with deliberate, like it's intentional. It's not going to happen by accident. So you're going to have to do this for your, no one's coming for you to help you do, you have to make that decision and just start taking one step.

We all have a next step, but we also all have 100 percent responsibility for that next step. And it doesn't have to be a big leap. It can be just turn on some music. Just take a deep breath, phone a friend and go to lunch. Let's not make it complicated. Just get started.

[00:12:33] Dawn Calvinisti: You talked a little bit at the beginning about balance and that you don't like that word, and I don't either. I've said that times. I don't believe there's such a thing, at least not like, like scale balance. I believe there's teeter totter balance. Like, one ends ends down at different times. How do you define balance? What? Does that mean do you use that word at all?

[00:12:52] Martine Williams: I don't, it's interesting. Like I say it sometimes because I know people are looking for that, right? Like it, when I'm sending out email, like that's what they want. Cause that's what everybody says. You've got to have work life balance. But when you think about scale, right, 50 percent and 50 percent to make it balanced, it has to be 50, 50.

And that's just not reality. And I think we all try to reach that and we're just. burning ourselves at both ends of the candle to reach this balance, when really you can think of it as harmony. If you think about an orchestra in a symphony, you have a really large tuba. It's a huge instrument, right, playing really loud. And then you have other instruments that are smaller, like a flute that plays really, really soft. But they play in harmony together, right? And so sometimes in your life and in your business, you're gonna need to play the tuba. It's really loud. So maybe your business is gonna have to play really loud this time of year.

Maybe this is the time, like when I was in direct sales, this was the busy time of the year was the fall. And I knew I was gonna have to play the tuba. And as long as I, communicate to my family, Hey, I'm gonna be playing the tuba over the next three months, then they knew that was what was gonna happen.

It wasn't like I was going away forever. And then there's seasons, like last year, my se, my son was a senior. And so I was playing the flute in my business and I was playing family time, like a tuba. And so you can have this harmonious, most beautiful sound that's coming from the different parts of your life.

When you look at it from a place of harmony and communicating what that's going to look like in the different seasons, because even as you're listening to that song that's playing, by the orchestra, there's, there's loud moments and there's soft moments. And then there's some in between moments, but you just have to realize it's.

The 5050 trying to reach that is just, it's impossible.

[00:14:29] Dawn Calvinisti: It's interesting. I find since the pandemic, the difference in what people are wanting, like suddenly we're reevaluating everything.

[00:14:38] Martine Williams: and 

[00:14:39] Dawn Calvinisti: What is actually important at this in our life. And what do we want to go forward with? And what do we want to let go of? Are you finding that as people are adjusting coming through this time, that they're also making a more. I guess a more important statement about what really is life for them right now.

[00:14:57] Martine Williams: I think they realized the slowdown. Like, I think we were all forced to slow down and I think they realized the pace that they were going. I know for me, that was my personal experience because, we were, we, we can learn from those crisis moments. And I think they were forced to slow down. And when you're forced to slow down, you have to kind of look around and what's going on.

Right? And a lot of times we I want to do that. We don't want to stop and look in the mirror. And like you said, ask those important questions. Am I spending time with the people and the places and the things that are helping me get to where I want to go? And I do think that time allowed for a lot of reflection and people are making different decisions and making more decisions, I think, from that place of who do I want to be? What am I here for? Who, what is really important to me in this season? The problem is, as we're kind of coming back out of it now, and the culture is starting to pick back up, and the pace is picking back up, they still have this desire to make the decisions from that place, but they're just seeing everybody going back to, that hustle, and they're like, Nope, I guess that's what I'm supposed to do.

Instead of trusting their intuition, trusting what they know and what they learned about themselves and having that confidence to make that decision based on that and not what they're seeing or what they're being told to do.

ADVERTISEMENT

Hey, wonderful listeners! If you're an entrepreneur or a business owner like me, then you know the struggle of juggling a million tasks while trying to focus on what really matters. Well, guess what? I've got a game-changer for you, and it's called Umbrella Virtual Solutions!

You know those tasks that make you want to pull your hair out? The ones you'd rather avoid like the plague? Yep, Umbrella Virtual Solutions has got you covered. Need a killer website that'll make your competitors jealous? Boom, they’re the web wizards you need.

And let's talk about virtual events. Everyone loves attending them, but the behind-the-scenes madness? Not so much. Luckily, these experts are your event architects. They'll plan, set up, and run the whole shebang, so you can shine in the spotlight without the tech headache.

Now, here's the best part: If you're a fellow podcaster, like yours truly, you know that editing can be a real audio nightmare. But fear not, because Umbrella Virtual Solutions are audio editing maestros. They'll transform your raw recordings into podcasting gold while you sip your coffee and relax.

And hey, who wants to drown in emails and social media management? Not me! That's where Umbrella Virtual Solutions really shine. They love diving into the admin abyss, leaving you with a clean slate to focus on your passion projects.

But hold on, there's more. These folks aren't just about ticking off tasks. They're your partners in business creation. Got a brilliant business but no clue where to start? They will guide you through the process, turning your dreams into a reality.

Do you know what they’ve done for me? They’ve given me back my time and peace of mind? Head over to umbrellavs.com and book a free strategy call. Say goodbye to overwhelm and hello to a whole lot of extra hours in your day.

That's umbrellavs.com – where dreams become reality and tasks become history. Check 'em out and get ready to conquer the world, one stress-free day at a time!

[00:16:07] Dawn Calvinisti: Yeah. One thing that I think is interesting too is the whole idea of one day you've talked about, like, one day I'm going to have it one day. It's going to look like this one day. It's going to, that's not coming. And I agree with you, that's not coming. And your one day is now and you need to create it now, but there, there is kind of two parts that I see with women that I, that I coach. One is that they, they get it right. They get it that I need to change and not be do, do, do, do. And I do need to start creating a life that's, that's not just manageable, but enjoyable and it's going to be good for the long run. But the other thing I sometimes see is women who have that feeling of, okay, but I am going to have, like, my kids are going to be older in five years and Then I'll be able to do that thing. And it's almost like there's a procrastination around the idea Going for anything until the time is better. The time is right. And I think that's also a detriment. So what do you do with with that kind of difference? One is I'll do it all now, but then the other is. Like, I need to wait for the timing.

[00:17:13] Martine Williams: Well, the fact is we're not guaranteed another breath. None of us are. None of us are guaranteed tomorrow. And so I always bring it back to that, first and foremost is you may not have another five years. I know that sounds doom and gloom, but it's just the fact. We saw that. That was very evident during the pandemic.

Life can change so quickly. And so why would we wait to create what you want in five years when you can start creating it now? It may not be exactly where you want it. Right now, but you can start taking steps. It's like people who, have this burning desire to be an entrepreneur, but they're still looking at corporate.

Well, I'm not going to tell you to quit your corporate job right now, but there are steps you can be taking to work towards exiting that if it's sucking the life out of you, it's not allowing you to have your boundaries and have time with your family. So it's not like all or nothing. And that's the mentality that we kind of have.

And I know a lot of my clients find that they realize I'm all or nothing here. It's either go, go, go or, or not. And so I think first and foremost, you're not guaranteed another day. And then why not start working on it now? And the reason why I believe most don't is because they're waiting to be ready.

And here's what everyone needs to hear on this call. Ready is a decision. It's not a feeling. It's a decision to make not a feeling to feel I did not feel ready when I started my podcast I did not feel ready when I birthed my first son I did not feel ready when I took my first step onto a big stage I didn't feel ready, but I decided to be ready and I decided to get ready and when we're waiting it's not because we don't want it a lot of times.

It's because we're afraid of failure. We're afraid of what people are going to think. We don't have all the confidence. We don't, especially if you're someone who likes all the details. That's me. I want the full blueprint of what I'm supposed to do. You don't have all those answers yet. So no wonder you're worried about it.

And no wonder you're giving yourself an out. And that's what they're doing. Does Yeah, sense?

[00:19:02] Dawn Calvinisti: Totally. All of my, my perfectionists out there, I know you're all like cringing right now. But, but we know it's true. We know

[00:19:10] Martine Williams: it's true. 

[00:19:11] Dawn Calvinisti: But the reality is, I mean, no matter what, you're never going to have all the details. And I that's an important thing to know. And, and really by taking the step, right, to know more.

You're going to know more. Reassess after and, and and tweak and so on.

[00:19:29] Martine Williams: Yeah, if you throw a dart at a dart board, and you're sitting there the whole time trying to aim the dart and get it in the bullseye, and you're waiting to get it perfect before you throw the dart, you're never going to learn where you're off until you throw the dart. You throw the dart, and then you see, am I to the right of the bullseye or to the left of the bullseye?

But until you throw that first dart, you don't know where you need to make adjustments. So you just have to take that first step. Do it, Bessie. Imperfect. I know before you have the perfect plan, be willing to take imperfect action because action brings clarity. Clarity brings confidence and confidence creates more action.

It's not the opposite. You have to take the action first and the confidence will come and then clarity will come and your confidence will increase.

[00:20:09] Dawn Calvinisti: Yeah. And I think that's a really key point here. The reality is confidence doesn't come until you start to see results. And how do you see results without taking action?

[00:20:21] Martine Williams: Right, right. It seems so simple, right? And listen, it's not easy. I'm not, I'm not saying anything that I'm saying are easy to do. It's just you just have to start. And I think we overcomplicate, we overthink. I'm the queen of that and I'm learning that it's not helping. It's not serving me to get to my goal is if I'm waiting.

around to be ready, 

[00:20:40] Dawn Calvinisti: I know we talked a little bit about this at the beginning, but now today in your everyday, what is the P that you most often fall back to? Is it people pleasing, perfectionism, or procrastination?

[00:20:54] Martine Williams: Probably perfectionism. And it's interesting because I never considered myself really a perfectionist until probably over the last, I don't know, probably six months, eight months, I started realizing like, okay, why am I not taking action? And it's a really great question to ask yourself. Why am I not taking action?

It's either the thoughts that I'm thinking, the feelings that I'm feeling and the thoughts have been, I don't have it all together. I don't have all the pieces of the funnel, right? I don't have all the pieces of the website done. I don't have all the pieces, well you know what? Someone said to me, they said, You're not, you're not making any income and you're not helping anyone.

Sitting where you are right now and trying to mull it all over in your head and get all the pieces together, you're not making any money and you're not helping anyone. And I was like, wow, you're right. And for me, it wasn't about the money. It was like, there are people out there who need to hear. And need to need to have coaching, and there are people there are women out there Who need to hear what I have to say, but because i'm in my own head About not having it perfect and not having all the things done.

No one's being helped And so that really actually had a friend years ago when I first launched my first course And she said the exact same thing to me And she said I said it's not ready. I said i'm supposed to go live on facebook and it's I just don't You know, I was freaking out about it She was like well, you're just being selfish Just like that.

And I was like, and I'm, I'm really like one of the most least selfish person that I know. I'm like, what are you talking about? I'm not selfish because you have something that someone else needs and you're trying to get all the details right. And so now no one's hearing it. You're being selfish. And that lit a fire under me.

Just like the comment this last six months, it lit a fire under me and I just went live and I'm like, you know what? I'm just going to do this. Same thing with coaching. Open up my coaching business. The website wasn't ready. I don't need a website to coach someone. I just need to talk to someone and tell them what I do and make offers to help them. That's it. That's really all I needed to do. And so that's what I did.

[00:22:48] Dawn Calvinisti: Where is the best place for us to connect with you if we want to hear more?

[00:22:52] Martine Williams: So I have a podcast, the Mom4Life Remixed podcast. My website is martinelilliams. com and then I mostly hang out on Instagram. It's kind of behind the scenes, real, real life stuff. So you can find me at martinelilliams and I'm also on LinkedIn. Those are the best places.

[00:23:07] Dawn Calvinisti: Perfect. And I know that you have a free gift for us. It's the burnout quiz and breakthrough tips. Can you tell us a little bit about what we can do with those?

[00:23:15] Martine Williams: Yes, so the quiz is awareness, right? That's the first step is having awareness. Like, are you on the verge of this burnout? And some of the questions may be like, I never would have thought of that as a burnout question. Excuse me. So it just kind of helps you to figure out where are you? Like, how close are you?

Are you in the middle of a burnout? Some of you may be able to answer that without even doing the quiz. And if that's so, if that's true, then you're not alone, number one. And that's why I have the breakthrough burnout tips. And so these are just some helpful things that have helped me, that has helped my clients take just some very simple steps to help you work your way out of it.

[00:23:45] Dawn Calvinisti: This is awesome. So if you are looking for all of this and all the contact info from our team, you can go to the show notes. We have everything there for you and make sure that you grab the quiz and the tips. And if there's anything else that you would like to wrap up with today, what do you have to say to our listeners?

[00:24:03] Martine Williams: I would say that your business, your parenting, your marriage or other relationships are only as healthy as you are. You are your greatest asset. You're not a liability. And so you really have to make sure that you're protecting your greatest asset. And that looks different for all of us, but all the other things that you're trying to keep good and trying to keep healthy and trying to keep successful are only going to be that because you're doing that for yourself.

[00:24:26] Dawn Calvinisti: Thank you so much for being on the podcast today, Martine, it is awesome to be able to have women come on who really have been there, who know what it's like, and who have a passion for really helping other women in that place to get out of it and not go through what we've been through. So thank you so much for being here.

[00:24:43] Martine Williams: Yes. Thank you so much for having me. .

[DAWN CALVINISTI]

Thanks for listening to today's show. If you found value in what you heard, please share it with a friend and rate and review us on whatever platform you listen on. It really helps get us out to other women who could benefit from listening. 

Check out our show notes for details from the show and to connect with me or our guests. Want to continue the conversation? My website is www.pursueprogress.com or DM me @pursueprogresswithdawn on Instagram. 

Until next week, pursue progress no matter how imperfectly.


Links from this episode:

CONNECT WITH DAWN:

Website: https://pursueprogress.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pursueprogresswithdawn

Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/pursueprogresswithdawn

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/imperfectioninprogress

Imperfection in Progress Podcast: https://pursueprogress.com/podcast

Grab your 200 Affirmations for the 3 P’s here: https://www.pursueprogress.com/affirmationspodcast

CONNECT WITH MARTINE:

Website: https://www.martinewilliams.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/martine31williams/

LinkedIn:  https://www.linkedin.com/in/martine31williams/

Exclusive Offers:  https://www.martinewilliams.com/exclusive-offers

Free Gift: Burnout Quiz and Breakthrough Tips

Link to Free Gift: https://www.martinewilliams.com/pl/2147709785

OTHER RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS PODCAST:

Umbrella Virtual Solutions: https://www.umbrellavs.com

Book Your Free 30 Minute Strategy Call with the host, Dawn Calvinisti: https://link.theviphub.ca/widget/bookings/dawncalvinisti/strategy

work life balanceperfectionismbeing intentional
Coming from a background of natural health Dawn has owned multiple businesses as a doula, a childbirth educator, a homeopath and eventually an essential oil based network marketing business.

Dawn spent 7 years building this business to multiple six-figures and reached the top 3% of leaders in just under 3 years.

As a recovering people-pleaser, perfectionist and procrastinator herself, Dawn created online  summits for women who want to move away from these 3 P’s and find more joy and less stress in life.

She has spoken internationally on multiple podcasts and online summits to inspire women to put themselves on their to-do list without apology. To bring her message to even more women, she launched her podcast “Imperfection in Progress” in January 2023 with a membership site to create community and provide accountability.

Dawn Calvinisti

Coming from a background of natural health Dawn has owned multiple businesses as a doula, a childbirth educator, a homeopath and eventually an essential oil based network marketing business. Dawn spent 7 years building this business to multiple six-figures and reached the top 3% of leaders in just under 3 years. As a recovering people-pleaser, perfectionist and procrastinator herself, Dawn created online summits for women who want to move away from these 3 P’s and find more joy and less stress in life. She has spoken internationally on multiple podcasts and online summits to inspire women to put themselves on their to-do list without apology. To bring her message to even more women, she launched her podcast “Imperfection in Progress” in January 2023 with a membership site to create community and provide accountability.

Back to Blog



Name

Testimonials



Name

Testimonials



Name

Testimonials



Name

Testimonials

Listener's Favorite

Episode 1

Episode 2

Episode 3

Get Your Free Clarity Tool Workbook Here

Feeling unsure of what your next steps are?

This tool is incredible for getting an honest look at where you are at, what is most important to you and what steps you should take action on.

You'll feel relief as you realize what things you can do less of and what area you should focus on right now.

Copyright ©2023 All rights reserved